New Release: Líom
Líom - Gán Tú
Welcome to Kalmtepunt.
I have released my new album titled Gan Tú, which translates to ‘Without You’. It’s an atmospheric ambient project that captures the many facets of loss. I've been grieving who I used to be - and also the people who were part of that version of me. These profound changes have been the driving force behind this 6-track journey, each piece shaped by the emotional terrain I’ve been navigating.
Remember that break I mentioned a while back? Turns out, it really was a major break from life as I knew it. Even more than I could have imagined. I stepped away to reflect and start reshaping my daily life. I began therapy, and I’m still learning how to live in alignment with the energy I have now. It feels a bit like I bought a one-way ticket to a new reality, one I’m still adjusting to. I'm not the same person I was before my chronic inflammatory illness - and receiving an epilepsy diagnosis only deepened the impact that being unwell has had on my life.
When health is no longer a given, you start to truly see what matters most. Beyond learning to shower myself with an almost ridiculous amount of compassion every single day, spending time with the people I love has become one of my top priorities. Taking care of myself is like baking a beautiful cake. Being with my favorite people is the icing, the chocolate, and the whipped cream. All in one.
Learning to spend my time more mindfully and choosing my people with intention made it painfully clear that some key figures are missing from my life. I'm not on good terms with several family members, and we’ve had no contact for a while. Even though I made the decision to cut off communication, it was still one of the hardest choices I've ever had to make. The many health challenges I’ve faced over the past years have thrown into sharp focus the people I truly, deeply wished were still by my side.
In the end, stepping away from anyone who wasn’t truly in my corner turned out to be one of the healthiest decisions I’ve ever made. The ones who were - and still are - have become more important to me than ever. My chosen people are the ones who help me through the hardest days, the ones who show up without question. I’m so grateful to know they’re there, unconditionally.
Mourning the loss of people I could no longer align with - spiritually or practically - took a real toll on me. It still feels unnatural at times to have broken bonds that once felt unbreakable. Standing up for my emotional boundaries often felt like being dropped onto a vast, desert-like planet, surrounded by endless sandbanks, with no clear direction. All I could do was face the fear of losing someone deeply dear to me. The most disorienting part was that I chose this - and yet - it still broke my heart.
Creating this album helped me survive the exhausting journey across that metaphorical, desolate planet. Just a few weeks ago, I finally felt ready to board my spaceship and make my way back to Earth. Now, when I look up at the night sky, it’s with a heavy heart. Grieving the reality I’ve had to accept, but also deeply grateful for learning to embrace and respect my own vulnerability. I know now that I need, and fully deserve, to feel safe with the people I choose to keep close. I’m closing this chapter, because time has become too precious - and I’m ready to honor mine.
I hope you enjoy this release. The album is available on all streaming platforms and can be bought through Bandcamp.
